By Marie Chokote
Photo by Ambro
It’s time for a check up … did I say check up? Yes I did. And by that I don’t mean a medical check-up (which by the way is highly recommended at least once a year for both adults and children). It is almost the end of the month, can you believe it? The first month of the new year is almost gone. How about those new year resolutions?
It got me thinking this morning: is January taking with it great resolutions and/or the hopes of accomplishing any of them this year? I hope not! But the reality is that for some of us, actually most of us, we are already getting discouraged for several reasons … mainly because we are yet to even get started. At first we had to recover from the busy month of December, then get the kids and ourselves back to school and work, after which we needed to get the tools needed to accomplish those resolutions we made, get ourselves (re)organized enough to start working on them, etc, etc, etc … sounds depressing? It doesn’t have to be, there is good news, and a way to put an end to the cycle.
I have found out over the last few years that taking resolutions at the beginning of the year is setting myself up for failure. So my first resolution is now: I will not make any new year’s resolutions! Here are a few suggestions for better results in 2012:
- Make your goals realistic, achievable, yet challenging and bold.
There is no point in setting goals like losing 10 pounds every month, when I have not been able to lose a single pound in a year. Or making the decision that I am going to wake up every day at 5 o’clock when I know I am not a morning person. Realistically, if my goal is to take more time to read, and I know I am not a morning person, I would wait until everybody is asleep at night, stay up 30 minutes later than usual and have that reading time I long for. It is the best of both worlds – I get to accomplish my goal without feeling the burden of getting up early, sleeping over a book, and most importantly, I am not feeling of guilty, and I avoid entering a vicious cycle of wanting to but not actually doing it. Maybe 30 minutes is too long? Then it brings me to my second suggestion:
- Take it easy; start slowly and advance gradually
I read somewhere that if you want to develop a new habit, do it consistently for 60 days and it becomes a habit. At first it should be all about establishing the habit, then increasing it in small increments until you reach your goal. After all we have 365 days in a year!!
- Do yourself a favor and set long term and short term goals
In line with the previous point, this will give you several tools. First of all if you see that you have accomplished something, anything, it gives you the will, strength and boost to go to the next level. Also, during those moments when you think you can’t, it is good to have a reminder of past victories. having short term and long term goals also gives you an evaluation and assessment tool. With that you can adjust from time to time, to the necessary changes and move on.
- Let go of the “all or nothing” mentality
Confession time: I used to be a runner, not professionally, but I love to run, I would take challenges from my husband who is a marathon runner and push myself a little more each day: minimum of 7 miles a day, but for almost a year now, I have not been able to do a thing. I went from a stay at home mom, to a mom with a full time job and full time load at school. Where do I find the time to go to the gym? I know I miss it dearly, and I kept thinking tomorrow, next week, next month…Next year? No!!! I decided that I didn’t have to wait until I had a good hour to go running, in fact why even wait to go for a run? So my first resolution was to do what I can with what I had. If I can’t run 7 miles, I can run the stairs in 10 minutes. So At work, each time I have a break I run up 4 flight of stairs 1 or 2 times. I started with once a day, now it is getting so much easier and fun that I can’t even keep track of how many times I do it. It is not the ideal, but I keep myself going
- Accountability is the key
Find a way to be accountable. Talk to your best friend, your parents, your partner, a supportive person about your goals. Give them the right to check on you, as you trust they will do it lovingly and won’t sugar coat it. If you keep it to yourself, it is easier to get side tracked when life happens because ultimately life will happen and you will have to adjust. It is also difficult to see what we have accomplished sometimes. The accountability partner will be able to remind you of those accomplishments when you most need it. Be careful not to choose someone that’s going to pull you down or discourage you.
- Give yourself a break and take time to celebrate
No need to get stressed out. Taking care of ourselves, enjoying life and celebrating the little victories make the journey more enjoyable
With this in mind, I wish you all again a Blessed New Year, filled with new beginnings. The past is behind, you have no hold on tomorrow, but the decisions you take today affect the rest of your life.
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