Photo by BrinsImage Photography
It goes back to the period even before a baby is born to a newly married African couple. In most African cultures, the birth of a boy child often marks an unforgettable highpoint in a traditional African home. He is an inheritor, a direct ‘extension’ of his father, the one who is going to continue the family legacy and take the family’s last name into future generations. This male child grows up with a clear understanding of his role in the family, which translates into his future relationships.
Here are 5 reasons why African men make good spouses:
1. Protector: He simply has to be the man … it’s as simple as that. This goes right to the core of his manhood. The African man is naturally proud; the lion of the family, strong and protective, he prowls around his wife and children – whatever threatens them becomes a direct source of danger to him too. The sense of security he brings to his relationships is what every woman wants.
2. Provider: His role as provider and bread winner for his family comes naturally to the African male, ingrained in him by his upbringing as ‘the man’. He is the provider not only of his immediate family, but also of his birth family – his responsibilities towards the well-being of parents, siblings, nieces, nephews and other close family members is seldom forgotten. The quality of help he provides to those closest to him is one of the things he will always be known for. To marry an African man is to be with a man who takes on his responsibilities as provider very seriously; even when circumstances do not permit him to, he never stops trying to maintain his natural role as head of the family.
3. Committed & respectful: Marriage is a mark of maturity for the African male: the boy has become a man. He takes this step seriously. His wife and the family they raise now define him. He tends to stay committed to his marriage. “My wife”, “my children” are words he proudly utters. An African man with a well-put together family is an automatic success story in the society. While he is not always a saint, he usually goes out of his way to keep his affairs under tight wraps. A man who disrespects his wife gets very little respect from others and is made fun of in the community. He is considered ‘lousy’.
4. Easily satisfied: Well, there’s an African saying that goes, “the easiest way into a man’s heart is through his stomach.” Preparing his favorite traditional meals and providing him meals is key to his happiness. He also likes to be well dressed and appreciates a clean home. Well, we can say he is relatively low-maintenance … except that those traditional meals take hours to prepare.
5. Adventurous: The African man does not mind venturing into the unknown. He would date other cultures, delve into different experiences and is more open to learning new things from his partner. Although he normally presents a strong outwards persona, most African men tend to remain ‘mama’s boys’ throughout their lives, needing their wives to be naturally nurturing.
Certain things like sending flowers, buying lingerie, taking you out for romantic dinners don’t always come naturally to him during the marriage; the good news is, the African brother is very much ‘teachable’.
Also by Lema Abeng-Nsah on Culture & Relationships
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